Landing Page Makeover Clinic #28:

Landing Page Makeover Clinic #28:

Reader Comments (46)

  1. Excellent makeover!

    I learned a lot of things from your review of his landing page!

    I really liked how you said:

    “Make your case in the first screen with a strong, provocative headline.”

    “Just One Typo Can Rob You of Credibility and Cash”

    So here is the perfect example of a copy that ’emotionally connects’ with the visitor! And this is exactly what we should aim for.


  2. Hey Roberta,

    It’s amazing how much I can learn by you dissecting this landing page. It’s the little things that make a huge difference. So many times we are working on something and we over look the simplest thing in our work not realizing that it can make a huge impact.

    Chat with you later…

  3. Wow, what a great makeover. I learned so much from your tips. I am going to keep asking “Why?” and “So what?” until I find the gems.

  4. Hey Roberta,

    Excellent post, I am starting to venture into product creation myself, and I have decided to use social media portals to test whether their is a growing need in a niche I am planning on pursuing. My question is, how long do you think someone should use Social Media to figure out what their customers needs are? Or do you think it’s all arbitrary?

  5. In the words of the immortal Yogi Berra: “When you come to a fork in the road…take it!”

    I guess that’s where I was with one of my problem sites. I just couldn’t figure out which way to go. I was struggling with some decisions. Your post helped me put some pieces of the puzzle in place.


    Steve Benedict

  6. Sometimes you get a pretty good headline written when you have a tight deadline looming. 🙂

    @Asim – I think you need enough time to not only research your marketing, but have time enough to test behaviors. So I’m thinking 3-6 months to get the job done right if you’re coming in cold. If you already have deep knowledge of your market, you can do it in less time. The direct marketer in me, however, only trusts what people do and not what they say. 🙂

  7. Such a good point! People will say all kinds of crazy things. 🙂 (That’s why surveys aren’t as valuable as actually testing a prototype or beta version of a product — there’s a huge difference between people saying they’ll buy and people actually buying.)

  8. Added benefit to the makeover: Just discovered a cool Software 🙂
    Do people really watch videos of products? I always prefer screenshots, but that’s maybe just me.

  9. Roberta & Sonia,

    Thanks for the advice. I believe it was Jay Abrahams who said “Everything is a Test”, so I understand the value of testing out the market before creating a product. 3-6 months testing is actually new to me, but it makes perfect sense, I guess you want to really drill down on what your market’s needs and wants are so you know the product would turn out to be profitable.

  10. @Asim – it’s more than just testing of your own product. It’s also about observing, researching market behaviors regarding competitive product.

    @Dana – More conversions, more visitors everyday. You’ve made my day, Dana!

  11. I love the concept of non-cutesy, dead-simple, plain-as-possible-English navigation. I see so many site owners have misleading nav items that waste precious seconds of the users’ time, and keep users away from the main objective of the site.

    That said, this particular landing page was pretty decent, so it’s cool to see that you were still able to improve upon it, Roberta. I’ve definitely seen some landing pages in this series in much more dire need of assistance!

  12. @Doron – it’s the already pretty good ones that really make me think “what is this missing, what more does it need (or what less does it require.) Clarity over clever, always.

  13. Honestly, they have to target the freelancer market. Oh, wait, they already have, by appearing on copyblogger. But we outsourcing pros need more than a few lines of text to get excited. They wouldn’t have to hard-sell to people who write/edit for a living. Just a bit more persuasive power will do.

    Someone who owns WS, another editing software with the same price tag, would appreciate it if they gave more info on the free trial, a way to get updates (just in case there’s a 50% sale in the future) and maybe some hints that it’s better than WS.


  14. Roberta,
    As a result of the series, we are making a lot of changes to the web, in fact, we are going to revamp it with all your advise and input. The one we have now, although improving conversion and visitors, still is not very professional.

  15. Wow! Exquisite talent you have in “drilling down” to pull out the diamonds. Amazing makeover which I thoroughly enjoyed reading. Thank you for sharing your insights. Just brilliant!!!

  16. @Roberta, thanks again for this. We obviously had some advanced sight of this text and we’ve already made changes based on it (new headline, joined and linked to Twitter, changed the navigation, added proper tags, made the video more visible). I also found a voiceover artist for the video, but am still working on the script. And I’m definitely going to use “Just One Typo Can Rob You of Credibility and Cash” I just need to think about where to deploy it.

    @Remy, the split between screenshots and videos is one of those strange things. Everyone has a preference and no one believes that people could possibly prefer the other. I definitely recommend providing both.

    @Ruby, thanks for the suggestions. I don’t think the homepage is necessarily the right place, but I’ll give some thought to making those elements clearer.

  17. Hi Roberta – Thank you. I love these tutorials. It’s far easier to follow when you’re using real life examples.

    When I saw the software and the price, I must admit, I wasn’t tempted by it at all. But your changes really drew attention to the benefits – especially the part about one typo ruining your credibility.

  18. I am curious what designers or writers are charging to design or redesign landing pages like this?

  19. Wow Roberta – this stuff is pure gold! I’ve tried the adwords->landing page model in the past and failed. You’ve just pointed out all the reasons why that happened!

    Thanks for sharing!

  20. G’Day Roberta,
    I think that your makeovers are one of the most valuable services provided by Copyblogger. I always , as i like to call it, “enjoy and learn.”
    And thanks to Brian and Sonia for providing the space.
    Make sure you have fun.



  21. Hi Roberta!

    I’ve just found your blog and really like the makeovers that you do. I find it’s always best to learn by ‘doing’, but with you doing it for us – it makes it even easier for me to learn! 🙂


  22. It’s funny how a lot of sites will tell you that organic seo is dead, but it’s really alive and well. In less than three weeks I’ve made it to the top of quite a few google pages with more than 60 million results.

  23. @Valerie – our own sites/pages are always the shoeless cobbler’s children.

    And now having seen it months after writing it, the headline should read:

    Just One Typo Can Rob You of Cash and Credibility

    Better flow and rhythm. 🙂

  24. This is probably the single most useful blog posting I’ve ever read. I’ve struggled to get my own site for local businesses off the ground and it’s almost painful at times where to put stuff (buttons, videos etc.) and how to say things…

    Thanks! now i’m going to go read this again!


  25. Roberta, Terrific stuff! (each and every time). I’d like to suggest the client put a benefit in his Title tag. You see, our SEO Title tags are our first opportunity to make a sale. They show up in at least 3 important places: 1) On the SERP (Seach engine results page) Hello! 2) Homepage title bar (upper left corner) and 3) Browser bookmarker Wrapping key phrases in benefits is the charge of the SEO copywriter – get found, get bought is how I like to roll. Try wrapping key words and key phrases in benefits all over the place – body copy, etc.

    Peace and profits, Tia D.

  26. I really enjoy these makeover posts. Yes, yes, yes to #4! It’s so common to see businesses hiding or not highlighting what they can’t or don’t do. Perhaps avoiding what may seem like a negative. But really, in doing so you are just asking for major user frustration and creating a much bigger negative in the end. Gotta be up front with those limitations, and there are many cases when you can actually put a positive spin on them.

  27. love the make-over and the written changes are amazing, makes such a psychological difference when reading the two. “Love the drilling down to find the gems” approach, gives me more to think about with my own pages
    thank you!

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