Stalled Out With Your Online Marketing? This May Be All You Need to Move Forward

Stalled Out With Your Online Marketing? This May Be All You Need to Move Forward

Reader Comments (82)

  1. i have down and broke for so long, i have greater talent but no clear way on which way to take, suddenly i stumble upon this post, it awakens me. from now on am taking this advice and i will be so violent and forceful towards my critics, i will make sure they tell me nothing. because Sonia gives me permission. i will print this and emboss it on my sitting room wall, so that my sons, brothers, parents, sisters and friends can see it, maybe they will get inspired too.

  2. Wow, I loved this post and it struck many chords with me, which probably says a lot about where I am right now.

    I will let it run through my mind each time I set out to do something new or advance what I already have. Thank you Sonia.

    • Allison,

      I think we might both be in the same place!

      For me, it is nice to know that I am not the “only one” . Subconciously we know that many people are in our “shoes”….but to see/hear others with the same issues makes it easier to move forward and take the next step.

      I too plan on keeping Sonia’s article in mind as I move forward!

    • It struck many chords with me also, especially the bit about “You watch while others pass you by. People who aren’t as good as you.”

      And damn it! I will raise my prices. My stuff is better than most of the similar stuff I’ve seen around the internet. But why have I been so afraid to admit it before?

      I’ve printed off this article and plan to read it many times more. I love it! It stirs my very soul.

  3. I wrote this real good novel but publishers think it is not commercial enough. I believe in it but I cannot find the power to tell myself I should publish as ebook on my own. I cannot give yself permission to do this somehow.

  4. I did not get any insights from this repeatedly repeated permission post. I’m sorry if I’ve made any unjust remarks.

    • It is possible, though not always easy. ๐Ÿ™‚ Biggest issue for most of us (including me) is to carve out space without interruptions. If you can work even an hour a day in the morning (or whenever you’re most productive) with everything turned off — twitter, phone, email, etc — you’ll be amazed at how quickly you can move forward.

      I find that if I don’t schedule and protect “work on the major stuff” time, the day gets eaten by trivialities.

  5. This is so great!

    Just yesterday I gave myself permission to do something I didn’t dare.

    I feel very good about it.

    And yes I have been waiting al those years. And now two permissions in two days.

    Thank you for this article

  6. You, and youall over there at CB, have a killer sense of what your audience needs and when. I’ve noticed this before, as if you were Seth, Tut, and of course Sonia and Brian et al, all rolled into one. Uncanny, and terrifically appreciated.
    A question: How does the collaboration between you two and the others involved affect the final result your audience sees? From here it feels like a synergy, somehow your visions complement, enhance and empower.
    How do you see it?
    Be interesting to read as a post sometime.
    What prompted it was thinking ‘ I want to be my version of CB when I get my show on the road’ and realizing that
    there need to be more people/ input involved to get to the vision I have.
    Thanks, as ever.

    • I agree, that would make an interesting post.

      Some people are lone wolves, I’m not one of them. I like to bounce ideas off other people and come up with something greater than what any of us could do individually.

      We talk fairly regularly and those conversations inform a lot of what you see here (as well as what I see in places like Teaching Sells and the Third Tribe). Brian and I (and then Robert) also started from a place of similar values. Sometimes it takes awhile to find that person who can bring something different and complementary, but who also shares your overall vision.

      I can really see you being the CB for your tribe! You have the vision and the voice, and I know you have the passion for details. ๐Ÿ™‚

  7. Sonia,

    psychologically speaking this is extremely powerful stuff… I would put extra emphasis to anyone reading this comment to go back up and re-read the section that Sonia wrote on ASKING FOR THE SALE. It’s OK to place a value on the work you do and it’s OK to ask people to pay.


    Ryan H.

  8. The “charge what I’m worth” hit home with me. It’s unbelievable the ways in which clients try to barter with me for a better price, discount, or a fraction of my rate because it’s already been “twice-edited” (not by me it hasn’t).

  9. Thank you very much Sonia.

    I did take a big expensive business course recently, and you have reinforced what I’ve also learned (and so much more of course) there.

    I’ve just recently done this:
    Launched an ebook (or two), quoted my prices with embarrassment, am in the midst of creating a more valuable product, focusing on customers who can afford what I offer, changed my MO on social media, haven’t giving a damn about the troll’s comments and so on.

    It has already begun to pay off.

    Everybody, listen to Sonia…

    Thank you,

  10. Excellent post! Generally, I feel confident and ready and on your mark, get set, but wait – sometimes I do want permission, to take myself seriously. Thanks for these words of encouragement!

  11. Great article, really helped me break through the “what if” thought process, and decide screw it, I am doing it. Thank you Sonia!

  12. Oh, and notice the “Print Friendly” button at the bottom right of this post.

    You might want to take a look at doing that too. I’m sure you’d have Sonia’s permission.

  13. Thanks Sonia. Your permission to be an authority is big in my world. Old ways based on credentialism (it should be a word) have given way to new relationships based on value and contribution. Exactly why I love Copyblogger and why you people ARE the authority.

  14. So timely! Thank you! I “heart” Sonia! ๐Ÿ™‚

    I don’t even have my actual site up yet, have 3 joint ventures in the works – part of one just went live on Saturday, lots and lots of energy and momentum, gaining confidence in what I can do, yet no money (but getting huge benefits in free stuff showing up and swaps being offered ๐Ÿ™‚ ) And I was just tipped off that I have a huge client coming my way, who needs my skills, and I am absolutely flummoxed with how to price my offering (everything I currently do has been partnership/joint venture or paid in kind). I have an idea but keep backing away from it. Let’s see what I can do with Sonia’s permission.

    Thank you!

  15. I am laughing but know this is not funny (and really very necessary) to some. If you are one of those people, listen to Sonia and then DO what she says. I built my business and became a CMO in a second one by taking those very scary, have-you-lost-your-mind steps.

  16. Interesting, I thought we’d have more women than men commenting today, but plenty of guys are stepping forward. ๐Ÿ™‚

    I wrote this because I see so much of it in our Third Tribe Q&A calls and in the Teaching Sells students. They have a ton to offer, but they’re not quite sure they’re the ones who are “allowed” to offer it. A little encouragement and they go on to kickass results. ๐Ÿ™‚

  17. Great post! We are often the biggest obstacle to our own success. Giving yourself permission to do what you need to do to succeed and not feel bad about it can be hard sometimes. Thanks for the permission slip!

  18. Great stuff, Sonia! I give *you* permission to replace “Simon Says”! ๐Ÿ˜‰

    Basically “Sonia Says” have CONFIDENCE in yourself, know what you want to accomplish and need to do to get there. Then just do it! You don’t need permission from anyone other than yourself to be a success and chase your dreams…

  19. AWESOME and timely article Sonia…thank you so MUCH!

    I have tears in my eyes…someone who doesn’t know me is speaking to my soul – giving me encouragement that is not always evident or forth-coming from my family and friends.

    A simple thank-you is not enough — may good kharma always follow you and kick bad kharma in the ass!

  20. Maybe it’s because I just watched the movie (for the zillionth time) over the weekend, but this reminded me of the Wizard of Oz this morning. The scarecrow, tin man and lion, even Dorothy, really didn’t need what they though they needed. Their true need was for someone to give them permission, confidence, more wisdom to follow their hearts and the belief that there was no “magic wizardry” needed. That’s really all the great and powerful Oz did. Thanks for being our Wizard today ๐Ÿ™‚

  21. Wow. I’ve been struggling with this for a long while. There’s so much about this post that resonates with me. Where I’ve been. What I’ve experienced. Wow. I’m printing it out. I’m giving myself permission to run my business of writing my own way. Thank you!

  22. Interesting this comes the same day as Seth Godin’s analogous post with a message to forget the long-tail and be the small head – the expert that leads the tribe – the authority in a niche.

    I’m getting lots of permissions today and loving it!

  23. Great to be reminded of that internal ‘controller’ that often stops us making progress – and to remind us that it’s not always advisable to take a blind bit of notice of it! Very thought-provoking – thank you!

  24. This is totally awesome! I loved it and it was a great way to kick off my morning developing my new site with a new look, and new stuff.

    You Rock Sonia!

  25. Great and TIMELY post!

    I’m one of those people who NEVER asks anyone for anything, so marketing doesn’t come “naturally” to me. However, now that I’m launching a book, it’s now EXTREMELY important to my livelihood.

    You’re so right: You donโ€™t get if you donโ€™t ask.

    Thanks for the great post. ๐Ÿ™‚

    – Jennifer

  26. Thanks Sonia. You’ve inspired me to finally let people know about my blog. I’ve been “preparing” and writing for a long time. It’s time to go to the next phase and begin marketing this thing.

  27. Taking these bold steps Sonia makes the difference. Know your product’s worth by knowing your worth. You are worthy! You deserve it! Drill these ideas into your mind so you never have issues with offering a product and charging for it. I just bumped the price on each of my ebooks up last night. I stated at the page and said….”Why”? Then, I rose the price and I now feel 1000 times better about my books, which will make potential customers feel 1000 times better about them, too. Thanks!


  28. Just starting out as a freelancer and you’ve given me the permissions I was looking for in your article. Sometimes, it’s great to have someone else being the angel on your shoulder rather than yourself!

  29. Hey Sonia,

    I sometimes stop on the cusp of something big (submitting a guest post pitch, requesting an interview) and think to myself, “Should I really be doing this? Am I allowed to do this?” The answer, I always discover, is YES!

    The reason why I ask these questions, and why I think others ask the same questions of themselves, is because we don’t think we’re worthy enough. Something from our past is holding us back, and making us play it safe in the comfort zone because that’s where we ‘should’ be. Our past, often deeply embedded, memories are constantly pulling at us to live our lifes in the same way that we’ve grown accustomed to, and that means playing small, or not speaking up, or ignoring our desires.

    There’s only one way past this – realise that we aren’t 10 years old any more. We’re not the kids who’s parents shout at us. We don’t need our parent’s permission, we don’t need anyone’s permission.

    We’re big enough and ugly enough to do whatever we please ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Stuart I think you nailed it: Something from our past is holding us back, and making us play it safe in the comfort zone because thatโ€™s where we โ€˜shouldโ€™ be. Our past, often deeply embedded, memories are constantly pulling at us to live our lifes in the same way that weโ€™ve grown accustomed to, and that means playing small, or not speaking up, or ignoring our desires.
      Thereโ€™s only one way past this โ€“ realise that we arenโ€™t 10 years old any more. Weโ€™re not the kids whoโ€™s parents shout at us. We donโ€™t need our parentโ€™s permission, we donโ€™t need anyoneโ€™s permission.

      Very WISE people making comments — thank you all!

  30. Sonia, I wanted to thank you for this article. I find myself always stalling or waiting for permission to do something in order to justify my spending time on something that may or may not work. When in reality I should just take the leap and get on with it already!

  31. The great therapist Milton Erickson gave some of his most dramatically successful clients nothing more than his permission for them to share their abilities with others. The African Violet Lady comes to mind.

    They just needed an authority figure to tell them it was all right to show that hidden dimension of themselves to other people.

    Sonia is an authority. If anyone asks where I got the idea I should publish my novel as an eBook I’ll say Sonia told me I could and I believe her. No need to be shy or coy about it.

    It is just that simple. It really is.

    If it makes you feel better pretend you are paying a therapist or life-coach or some kind of expert to tell you to take that next step and venture into new experiences that you know you are ready to meet yet are reluctant to deal with only because it isn’t part of a well-worn, hard-wired, habit– safe within your comfort zone.

    Sonia knows what she’s talking about. I mean it.

  32. Sonia, how did you know this was my state of mind right now? You’ve lifted the depressing fog that’s been enveloping me…and gave me the permission I didn’t need but that I craved anyway. Thanks so much…

  33. I definitely know the feeling of having something I want to do but being to paralyzed with doubt to follow through with it. My method for dealing with it has three steps:

    1. Tell myself that I’m going to do a project for the educational value, and if when it’s done, I’m not comfortable releasing it, I don’t have to

    2. Do the project

    3. Look over what I’ve produced and ask whether it’s worth publishing/pitching/releasing

    4. Take action

    telling myself I don’t HAVE to act gives me a sense of freedom that, paradoxically, makes it possible for me to act

  34. You have no idea how timely and how perfect this was. I needed the permission…now to get over the fear of EXACTLY what I need to do. It is so time. And now I have the permission. Thank you. So much. ~ lisa

  35. Great post Sonia. You highlighted a very important point that in some cases can hold us back for a very long time – we never gave ourselves permission to try.

  36. Wow! The opening of this post really hit me hard – it’s exactly how I’ve been feeling the last week. I’ve been wondering “when” things should happen, like self-publishing or making a blog post. And now I think I know when: I should do it now. Right this second. Marketing can come after you have a product, too. Just get it out there.

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